Welcome to the family
Hope you have a real good life
With my little sister
Yeah, she'll make a real good wife
Hope you have lots of babies
Hope you get a real good job
Hope you don't mind company
'Cause we'll be here a lot
And brother here's some brotherly advice
If you know what's good for you you'll treat her right ('cause)

'Cause Grandpa's the local sheriff
Yeah he's the judge and the jury too
Uncle Bill's the undertaker, Son
He'll dig a hole for you
Cousin Jesse, he's just crazy
He'll fight you just for fun
Mama's got a real bad temper
And daddy's got a shotgun

Welcome to the family
And this side of the tracks
If you ever leave her
You ain't coming back
My nephew Red's a hunter
He's gonna hunt you down
Just like he did the last one
And he still ain't been found
Now I like you just fine, don't get me wrong
But boy take care of her 'cause if you don't

'Cause Grandpa's the local sheriff
Yeah he's the judge and the jury too
Uncle Bill's the undertaker, Son
He'll dig a hole for you
Cousin Jesse, he's just crazy
He'll fight you just for fun
Mama's got a real bad temper
And daddy's got a shotgun

'Cause Grandpa's the local sheriff
Yeah he's the judge and the jury too
Uncle Bill's the undertaker, Son
He'll dig a hole for you
Cousin Jesse, he's just crazy
He'll fight you just for fun
Mama's got a real bad temper
And daddy's got a shotgun

Welcome to the family
Hope you have a real good life
With my little sister
Yeah she'll make a real fine wife

Copyright: BMG Rights Management, Downtown Music Publishing, O/B/O DistroKid, Spirit Music Group, Warner Chappell Music, Inc.
Writer(s): JIM COLLINS, WAYNE KIRKPATRICK