When I was ten I had a live in babysitter,
She had a pet Kangaroo wore big breasts and feathers.
She gave me ice cream every time I screamed and hollered
And I loved her till I caught her sexing my father.

She gonna hurt you daddy never again,
She wasn't a friend, so I killed her.
She gonna hurt you daddy never again
She wasn't a friend, so I killed her.

When I was thirteen the plumber stopped by,
The house was flooding and no one knew why.
Within no time at all he got rid of the water
And I was grateful till I caught him plunging my mother.

He gonna hurt you momma never again,
He wasn't a friend, so I killed him.
He gonna hurt you momma never again
He wasn't a friend so I killed him,
She gonna hurt your daddy never again,
She wasn't a friend, so I killed her.
She gonna hurt you daddy never again
She wasn't a friend, so I killed her.

And I don't feel bad about it.
Say what? And I don't feel bad about it.
These are my fondest childhood memories.
I was just a kid, so they let me go despite the murders that I did
All grown up now as you can see,
My parents are still happily married thanks to me.
These are my fondest childhood memories

Copyright: Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Universal Music Publishing Group, Wixen Music Publishing
Writer(s): JEREMY RUZUMNA, JUSTIN MELDAL-JOHNSEN, NATALIE HINDS, VICTOR INDRIZZO