How do you work this thing?
That's what I want to know
It should reinflate when you've used it
So you can have yourself another go

If I told you I loved you, baby
I certainly meant what I said
But my arms are blunt and my legs are sharp
And there's nobody home in my head

How do you work this thing?
How do you work this work this work this work this
Thing

How do you work this thing?
That's what I want to find out
Everything it connects with
Only leaves a kink in the spout

How do you work this thing?
How do you work this work this work this work this

Who's been feeding tomatoes to the cat?
I have never seen a vegetarian cat
I just want to sleep on you and leave it at that

Ah, how do you work this thing?
How does it loop the loop?
How does it point correctly
And not into the chicken coop?

If I told you I loved you, baby
I certainly spoke my mind
But one day's egg is the next day's chicken
And the chicken I rely on is blind

How do you stop this thing?
How do you turn it off quick?
It's startin' to spray all over the place
It's sprayin' my feet and it's sprayin' your face
And it's makin' the customers makin' the customers
Makin' the customers makin' the customers
Sick

Copyright: BMG Rights Management
Writer(s): Robyn Hitchcock