Alms! Alms!
For a miserable woman
On a miserable chilly morning

Thank yer, sir
Thank yer

Ma'am, could you tell me whose house this is?

Ah, that's the great Judge Turpin's house, that is

And the young lady who resides there?

Well, that's Johanna, his pretty little ward
Keeps her snug, he does, all locked up
So don't you go trespassing there
Or it's a good whipping for you
Or any other young man with mischief on his mind"

Ow, would you like a little muff, dear
A little jig jig
A little bounce around the bush?
Wouldn't you like to push me parsley?
It looks to me, dear
Like you got plenty there to push

Alms! Alms!
For a desperate woman

Copyright: Warner Chappell Music, Inc.
Writer(s): Stephen Sondheim