Two cool cats just sittin' at the bar.
Tellin' each other how hip they are.
Talkin' 'bout millions an' spendin' them dimes.
Jackin' their jaws an' just wastin' their time.

I ain' t lyin'.
I ain't lyin', no.
I ain't lyin'.
'Cause I've seen it a thousand times.

In walks a shapely, young, dark-haired, beauty.
Two heads come spin around just like "Howdy Doody".
Each one is thinkin' that he wants what she's got.
But she's gettin' better lookin' with-a ev'ry shot.

I ain't lyin'.
I ain't lyin'.
I ain't lyin', no.
'Cause I've seen it a thousand times.

Watched one sucker start to make his play.
I hear him mumblin' as he's walkin' away.
Tried to tell his-self, she wasn't really that fine.
But that he still could-a caught the really been tryin'.

I ain't lyin'.
Oh, I ain't lyin'.
I ain't lyin', no.
I ain't lyin'.

'Cause I've seen it a thousand times.
Now, look here.
You think I'm lyin' but guess what?
I don't care.

'Cause I'm a witness, an' I swear I was there.
I seen that next fool, sit up an' beg.
Sometime a man ain't nothin' but a dog on two legs.

I ain't lyin', ooh no.
I ain't lyin'.
I ain't lyin'.
'Cause I've seen it a thousand times.

Copyright: Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC
Writer(s): HARRY WAYNE CASEY, RICHARD RAYMOND FINCH