Like a nightclub in the morning, you're the bitter end
Like a recently disinfected shithouse, you're clean round the bend
You give me the horrors
Too bad to be true
All of my tomorrows
Are lousy 'cause of you
You put the Shat in Shatter
Put the Pain in Spain
Your germs are splattered about
Your face is just a stain

You're certainly no raver, commonly known as a drag
Do us all a favor, here, wear this polythene bag

You're like a dose of scabies
I've got you under my skin
You make life a fairytale
Grimm!

People mention murder, the moment you arrive
I'd consider killing you if I thought you were alive
You've got this slippery quality
It makes me think of phlegm
And a dual personality
I hate both of them

You're bad breath, vamps disease, destruction, and decay
Please, please, please, please, take yourself away
Like a death a birthday party
You ruin all the fun
Like a sucked and spat-our Smartie
You're no use to anyone
Like the shadow of the guillotine
On a dead consumptive's face
Speaking as an outsider
What do you think of the human race?

You went to a progressive psychiatrist
He recommended suicide
Before scratching your bad name off his list
And pointing the way outside

You hear laughter breaking through, it makes you want to fart
You're heading for a breakdown
Better pull yourself apart

Your dirty name gets passed about when something goes amiss
Your attitudes are platitudes
Just make me wanna piss

What kind of creature bore you
Was it some kind of bat?
They can't find a good word for you
But I can

Twat!

Copyright: Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC
Writer(s): John Cooper Clarke