Kids, I don't know what's wrong with these kids today
Kids, who can understand anything they say?
Kids, they are disobedient, disrespectful oafs
Noisy, crazy, sloppy, lazy loafers
And while we're on the subject

Kids, you can talk and talk till' your face is blue
Kids, but they still do just what they want to do
Why can't they be like we were?
Perfect in every way
What's the matter with kids today?

Kids, I've tried to raise you the best I could
Kids, all the things I've done were for your own good
Kids, can't you once appreciate how I've sacrificed?
Working, slaving, scrimping, saving, pennies
(And living with your father)

Kids, no one know the burdens I've had to bear (and in my condition)
Kids, I'm a poor sick woman and does he care? (Hah)
Go on, go on and kill me
That's what it's coming to
When a mother has kids like you

Kids (all the chicken soup that I made for you)
(Momma take it easy)
Kids (now you throw me out, like a worn out shoe)
Not in front of everybody mom
After all I haven't been such an awful son
I never sass you back or leave a ring around the bath tub
And don't I always phone you?

Kids, you can give your life to them night and day
Kids, then they go get married and move away (married, ah)
(Who's getting married?)
Why do we have these children?
Better to have a pet
(You know where you stand with the pet)

I never asked for nothing
Nothing is what you get
What's the matter with kids
To-

I tried Lou, but I failed
Oh, you didn't mama, you didn't
Don't try to pay me back sonny, I forgive you
So what if you're an ingrate?
So long as you're happy
I don't wanna be happy
Don't feel guilty, just make believe I'm an old, used car
Junk me leave me in the gutter
Oh, I'll never leave you, never
(You heard him you're a witness)
My promise mama I never broke a promise to my mama
Good boy
Why can't they be like albert?
Perfect in every way

What's the matter with kids?
Yeah what's the matter with kids?
Nothing's the matter with kids today

Copyright: Capitol CMG Publishing, Integrity Music, Songtrust Ave, Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Warner Chappell Music, Inc.
Writer(s): Charles Strouse, Lee Adams